brows
i took a break from maniacally listening to lana del rey to eat a frozen leftover crepe and find a phone full of text messages. a phone full of text messages i didn’t have the energy to respond to. so i poured syrup onto the crepe as it rested in my hand and shoved the entire thing in my mouth, as though had i waited a second more someone might take it away and punish me for feeding myself after midnight. the television was still on in the living room, muted but on. ryan gosling and rachel mcadams were crying in the rain about something. it seems like every time i turn on the television lately, the notebook is on. i fell into the couch, somehow already holding another crepe, this time without syrup. i sang my best “video games” under my breath in between somewhat more dainty nibbles and trying to find some way to distract myself with the internet. the internet is full of crap these days. when i looked back up again, some period piece was on television. was it natalie portman? maybe? i don’t know. i never care much for period pieces.
tomorrow is the last day of a year that has largely been a little bit shitty. which is not to say it hasn’t been inspiring or that amazing things haven’t occurred. i mean, shit, i went to bali. and mexico. and columbus, ohio. it’s better than you think. i’m excited about 2012, but i think i’m not supposed to be. 2012 is really just the 365 days that follow tomorrow. the only distinction is an arbitrary one we give it. 2012 is not some hard reset. but, you know, make of it what you will.
so, tomorrow morning we’ll head to pike place for dinner fixings. pike place gives me the worst anxiety. all these assholes not paying attention to their surroundings, shuffling through the narrow stalls on the wet, slick floors, bumping into each other without a thought. and people throwing fish at each other. or to each other, whatever. the point is: people. throwing fish. what kind of america do i live in?
anyhow, i can’t sleep. this may or may not, but likely does, have something to do with the two cups of coffee i had at 10:30.
okay, it’s definitely natalie portman. she’s currently stripping for some older guy and her brows are out of control. what am i watching?
happy new year. i’m going to return to lana del rey and looking at photos of iceland on the internet.
love.
(by the way, this is me attempting to write more)
